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| 25 Weeks |
"How about number [blabedyblah]? I have that but it's not mint."
"Is it torn or just bent? Any grease stains or food? Creases are normal. Do you have number [bladedyblah] the first appearance of [bloopedybloo]?"
"No, but I've got [blabedyblah] and [blabedybloo]."
"Oh, the first appearance of [blabedybleena]—nice, man."
I can feel our son kicking inside of me as I eye the colorful walls of the store and wait for Greg and the owner of [blabedyblechyblow] to finish swapping Spidey talk. I'm impressed. I have never heard this side of my husband. It's like something triggered the part of his brain that was once a highly trained secret agent for Comic Con and I just watched him accidentally assassinate someone with a Vulcan death grip. Who else is in there? I'm seeing a whole new Greg and he's really sexy, in that Peter Parker kind of way.
If being pregnant has taught me anything so far, it's that REALLY, NO, REALLY you can try to plan your life but perhaps life has plans for you, or even further—there are no such things as "plans". You better be open to that idea or you're going to spend a lot of time trying to keep yourself from punching things.
"Keep the channel open." - M. Graham
I think being open isn't just about being flexible or listening to new ideas without laughing. I think being open has a lot to do with discovery. Letting go of preconceived notions. When I lived on the subway in New York City—I mean when I commuted daily to and from work—I came up with a theory to categorize the people I watched. There were 33 types. "Ah. By the doors, there's #29, Hipster-Trust-Fund-Boy sitting next to #14, Native-New-Yorker-Down-On-His-Luck-Security-Guard and #18, Overworked-Single-Mom-Lawyer-With-Nanny." 33 labels. 33 identities. After a while, I could peg their stops or win bets with myself over who would give change to the busking break dancing team. Of course this was a harmless game I played with myself, but in reality, stereo types are judgments and judgments lead to assumptions and assumptions can lead to the inability to listen or learn from each other.
When Greg used to tell me, "I know a lot about my comic books." I thought, "Um, hm... when you were twelve." My husband, the grown up who studies the Bhagavad Gita as a hobby, he really does know his comics. I observed him in action.
We humans are so much more than the small combination of influences we allow certain sections of our world to see. Maybe #29-by-the-doors is actually a Hipster-Trust-Fund-Boy on the subway, but perhaps when he sits next to a hospital bed holding up his dying grandmother, he's just as powerful a witness to her life as any spiritual leader. We are all capable of the same stuff—when we listen to each other.
Discovery. That is what being a kid is all about, right? And being human too, at any age, I suppose. I hope that as I add the parent label to my identities, I am able to share what I've learned in ways that our son can discover. And I hope I can do that by holding back judgement and assumptions. These days I call him #1, Spoiled-Little-Kicker. I should work on that.
If being pregnant has taught me anything so far, it's that REALLY, NO, REALLY you can try to plan your life but perhaps life has plans for you, or even further—there are no such things as "plans". You better be open to that idea or you're going to spend a lot of time trying to keep yourself from punching things.
"Keep the channel open." - M. Graham
I think being open isn't just about being flexible or listening to new ideas without laughing. I think being open has a lot to do with discovery. Letting go of preconceived notions. When I lived on the subway in New York City—I mean when I commuted daily to and from work—I came up with a theory to categorize the people I watched. There were 33 types. "Ah. By the doors, there's #29, Hipster-Trust-Fund-Boy sitting next to #14, Native-New-Yorker-Down-On-His-Luck-Security-Guard and #18, Overworked-Single-Mom-Lawyer-With-Nanny." 33 labels. 33 identities. After a while, I could peg their stops or win bets with myself over who would give change to the busking break dancing team. Of course this was a harmless game I played with myself, but in reality, stereo types are judgments and judgments lead to assumptions and assumptions can lead to the inability to listen or learn from each other.
When Greg used to tell me, "I know a lot about my comic books." I thought, "Um, hm... when you were twelve." My husband, the grown up who studies the Bhagavad Gita as a hobby, he really does know his comics. I observed him in action.
We humans are so much more than the small combination of influences we allow certain sections of our world to see. Maybe #29-by-the-doors is actually a Hipster-Trust-Fund-Boy on the subway, but perhaps when he sits next to a hospital bed holding up his dying grandmother, he's just as powerful a witness to her life as any spiritual leader. We are all capable of the same stuff—when we listen to each other.
Discovery. That is what being a kid is all about, right? And being human too, at any age, I suppose. I hope that as I add the parent label to my identities, I am able to share what I've learned in ways that our son can discover. And I hope I can do that by holding back judgement and assumptions. These days I call him #1, Spoiled-Little-Kicker. I should work on that.
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